Here are ten ways of knowing you're flying on Singapore Airlines' proposed new low budget airline...
10. No boarding pass is needed – you use your EZ Link card (but do remember to swipe out when you disembark).
9. On-board drinks consist of 2 choices, Longkang Water or NewWater
8. The world-famous “Singapore Girls” are replaced my "former-macdonald aunties" (part of SIA policy to hire retirees)
7. Comfy seats have been replaced in favour of foodcourt stools (another space saving technique) , gives new meaning to "hanging on the edge of your seat" during take-off and landing.
6. There is no air-conditioning and no toilets (to maximise space) – all windows remain open throughout the flight, patrons are advised to contain bodily waste in their own bags and throw it out the window.
5. Food? Who said anything about food?
4. The planes land on Pulau Ubin, proceeded by an hour long trek to the pier (this would be shorter in the event you get chased by wild boars) followed by a 30 minute Bum-Boat ride to the mainland.
3. Inflight entertainment consist of amusing yourself with whatever you can find.
2. There is no such thing as first, business or economy class. Instead they have been renamed, Sub-Standard, Wet Market and Dog hole.
1. The planes are flown by WW2 veterans (lots of flight experience at zero percent insurance premiums!).
10. No boarding pass is needed – you use your EZ Link card (but do remember to swipe out when you disembark).
9. On-board drinks consist of 2 choices, Longkang Water or NewWater
8. The world-famous “Singapore Girls” are replaced my "former-macdonald aunties" (part of SIA policy to hire retirees)
7. Comfy seats have been replaced in favour of foodcourt stools (another space saving technique) , gives new meaning to "hanging on the edge of your seat" during take-off and landing.
6. There is no air-conditioning and no toilets (to maximise space) – all windows remain open throughout the flight, patrons are advised to contain bodily waste in their own bags and throw it out the window.
5. Food? Who said anything about food?
4. The planes land on Pulau Ubin, proceeded by an hour long trek to the pier (this would be shorter in the event you get chased by wild boars) followed by a 30 minute Bum-Boat ride to the mainland.
3. Inflight entertainment consist of amusing yourself with whatever you can find.
2. There is no such thing as first, business or economy class. Instead they have been renamed, Sub-Standard, Wet Market and Dog hole.
1. The planes are flown by WW2 veterans (lots of flight experience at zero percent insurance premiums!).
posted by Jecht at 3:25 AM
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