Priorities

Feeling moody and listless, in the office now. *sigh… Had a minor tiff with you know who yesterday over one of her male friends who has taken quite a fancy to her.

What irked me was the final SMS message which I received from you know who. I got this feeling there’s going to be a lot of things which I should know but probably never hear, why? Simply because I ask questions that have answers which I’m not prepared for.

Things like who she’s out with, where she’s going, what she’s doing will be left unanswered why? Because there’s no need for me to know. I guess as her companion I’m not entitled to know any of these. It feels like there’s no obligation at all or any responsibilities in our relationship. In short, it’s a free for all.

Does it mean we can see anyone we want and do whatever we want without even considering the feelings of the other party? Seems that way now. It’s none of my business anyway. The only comfort I’m given is that she has me in her heart. If I really existed in there would I be feeling this way? Why did I get upset in the first place?

Will there be secrets and lies flying about? Skeletons will start to stockpile in the closet and I foresee a lack of communication which will lead to distancing from each other. Then again I hope all these aren’t true but they all seem pretty realistic now.

The battle seems to have swayed against my favour. Am I going to get through this? Are my feelings justified or am I in the wrong? Actually why should I bother? It seems she doesn’t want me to care anyway. I should be irresponsible and do what I please is that what a boyfriend should do? *sigh…